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I'm going to write fifteen things about fifteen people on my friends list. It's up to you to guess which one applies to who.
1. You always were a cunt, and I'm glad your monkey died.
2. I wish I were as smart as you. It's not everyone who can swing both a Nobel Prize and the dean's list.
3. Don't worry. I won't tell anyone about the herpes.
4. You dumbass. Bacon does not belong in a vegan diet.
5. No matter what you think, Spiderman does not qualify as capital-L literature.
6. I'd rather read the ingredients list on Preparation-H than glance at even one more of your journal entries.
7. You inspire me.
8. You have the biggest, most voluptuous boobs I've ever seen. You could be the poster child for one of those HGH spams.
9. It isn't just paranoia. I really do want to scalp you with a rusty paperclip.
10. Damn, you be fine, girl!
11. If I were ever to become an adulteress, it would most certainly be with you.
12. Someday, if I try really, really hard, I may be as funny as you.
13. Soap is a good thing. Try it! You'll like it. I promise....
14. Someone has to tell you that whenever you recite pi, you get the fourteenth digit wrong every time.
15. You have a sweet ass.
Any guesses?
1. You always were a cunt, and I'm glad your monkey died.
2. I wish I were as smart as you. It's not everyone who can swing both a Nobel Prize and the dean's list.
3. Don't worry. I won't tell anyone about the herpes.
4. You dumbass. Bacon does not belong in a vegan diet.
5. No matter what you think, Spiderman does not qualify as capital-L literature.
6. I'd rather read the ingredients list on Preparation-H than glance at even one more of your journal entries.
7. You inspire me.
8. You have the biggest, most voluptuous boobs I've ever seen. You could be the poster child for one of those HGH spams.
9. It isn't just paranoia. I really do want to scalp you with a rusty paperclip.
10. Damn, you be fine, girl!
11. If I were ever to become an adulteress, it would most certainly be with you.
12. Someday, if I try really, really hard, I may be as funny as you.
13. Soap is a good thing. Try it! You'll like it. I promise....
14. Someone has to tell you that whenever you recite pi, you get the fourteenth digit wrong every time.
15. You have a sweet ass.
Any guesses?
