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I have a plethora of publications this year. Here's what came out so far!



Yesterday was my last day at the McCormack Writing Center's winter workshop. I workshopped excerpts from my memoir-in-progress: Leaving Armageddon. Feedback was encouraging. I shared a hybrid collection of personal essays and poetry, and the takeaway is that readers want more. More. MOAR. I used my fellow workshoppees' feedback as writing prompts. Looks like I need to write more specifically about Armageddon, and what it meant to me as a kid. Funny that, especially considering the working title I gave the project.

I am also working on a collection of short stories called Every Tear From Their Eyes. This is related to my memoir as it is based on the premise of Jehovah's Witness teachings/prophecies being literally true. I've already written a cosmic horror flash called "The Good News," a short story called "Rich-People Houses," and another called "No Happy Endings." The latter was commissioned for an upcoming anthology in The Asylum of Terror series. Feedback from my weekly horror group has been positive, and just today, I received notification that my collection has been awarded a creation grant from the Ontario Arts Council through the recommendation of House of Anansi Press. I am grateful for their support. It's good to know that people want to read my stories.


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I'm busy, as usual.

My drabble The Bison Return with the Prairie Grass is a winner of Augur Magazine's microfiction contest.

My story "The Grave of Robert Kirk," a folkloric tale of what happens when the aforementioned grave is robbed, is forthcoming in Once Upon a Moonless Night. The Kickstarter is live.

My story "The Menopause Chrysalis," a weird tale of an ageing two-spirit person dealing with the medical system and the dream world, is forthcoming in Yay! Free and Queer All Queer. The Kickstarter is live.

I'm continuing to work on a story tentatively called "We All Fall Down." It was supposed to be a short story, but so far, it's a novelette and may end up a novella. Oops. It's about a nonbinary tween in a small, desert town, and is set in the early 1980s. It's a puberty horror story, and I'm having fun writing a ritual scene, most recently.

I'm also making good headway on revisions of my novel The Everwhen. I hope a publisher jumps on this. I'm proud of it.
shanmonster: (Tiger claw)
I've had two publications this week:

My poem "Stillborn" has been published by Nightmare Magazine as well as their podcast. You can read it or listen to it.

My poem "Angakkuq," which was an Aurora finalist, has been published in Year’s Best Canadian Fantasy and Science Fiction: Volume Three.

If you patronize the A-Hole (my pet name for Amazon), you can follow my author page to find out what is being released there for sale.

One of my drabbles recently won a prize, but I can't officially announce which one or where. Yet.

I'm currently co-writing a science fiction story with several other authors. Can't say much other than it involves pigeons and astronaut ice cream. It's a fun project!

I have started keeping track of how many submissions/rejections/acceptances I get each month. It's the 17th of October, and my tally shows 54 submissions, 14 rejections, and 2 acceptances. I know most people are unable to spend that much time sending things out, and I am grateful and incredibly lucky to be in a position to do so.

It is wholly unfair that, unless you are Stephen King or the dread JK Rowling, it is pretty much impossible to live on your writing. Our capitalist society does not support arts and culture. I hate that even winners of multiple, top awards are unable to achieve a living wage from their writing, and that many authors are being forced to withdraw from their writing careers in order to eat and keep the lights on.

It doesn't help that their/our writing is being stolen wholesale by Large Language Models and repackaged via ChatGPT and the like. If you use ChatGPT, you are not only complicit in the theft of author's living wages, but also in the destruction of ecosystems. Data centres use more power and water than cities, and greenbelts, forests, and farmland are regularly being destroyed to erect even more.

Here is a human-written story I've read recently which resonates with me:

Welcome to Your Authentic Indian Experience by Rebecca Roanhorse. Written in the dreaded second-person (which I personally enjoy), this toothsome example of Indigenous Futurism shows what happens when new technology is used as a toe-hold for destructive cultural appropriation. It's a microcosm of what has happened and what continues to happen.
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If you want to hear me read some of my new, unpublished work, you'll have an opportunity this Friday. I'm one of the readers for Flights of Foundry. This is a 100% free online speculative fiction convention with writers and readers from all over the world. My reading is on Friday at 1:00 EST.

I'm also on a panel about Indigenous Horror on Sunday at 5:00 with Shane Hawk and Johnnie Jae.

There are all sorts of readings, panels, fan chats, author chats, role playing games, and more all weekend. Sign up for free at Flights of Foundry.

The next anthology I'm in drops in two days, I think. I just got my copy the other day. Moonlit Getaway is publishing their first anthology: Harvest Moon. My flash fiction "Sirens Don't Sing Underwater," about what's going on with the sirens from The Odyssey, is featured within.

Pre-orders are now open for the ebook version Year’s Best Canadian Fantasy and Science Fiction: Volume Three. My Aurora-finalist poem "Angakkuq" (first published in On Spec is included. I'm pretty chuffed that I've finally snuck my way into this killer anthology series. I'm bookmates on here with some big names. The trade paperback pre-orders haven't begun yet. You can take a look at the table of contents here.

I recently placed a flash fiction with another anthology series. I won't say the name yet until I get all the details, but my story is "The Bird Husband." It's been shortlisted and longlisted for a few contests, but never made it to print. I'm glad it's finally getting its moment. What makes it particularly interesting to me is that not two minutes before getting an acceptance for it, it had received yet another rejection.

Taste is subjective.

My story The Snow Hath No Queen was rejected from many places but went on to win two awards, and my poem "Angakkuq" was rejected by several before it became an Aurora finalist. Go figure.

I recently completed a new short story called "The Old Woman Who Became a Bear." It is a retelling of Papik, Who Killed His Wife's Brother collected by Knud Rasmussen about a hundred years ago. I'm currently shopping that around.

Also working on another short story tentatively called "We All Fall Down." This one is a tale of puberty horror, and is pretty funny so far. It may end up a novelette, that most difficult of story lengths to home.

In other news, a week ago, I went to DreadCon. It was my first horror convention, and, over all, I had a good time. I ended up buying a whole wack of books to add to my stupendously-large To Be Read pile. I spoke with a bunch of authors, and also with a few editors. One of those editors has just requested the full manuscript for my novella The Temperance Ridge Runaways. I sure hope she likes it, because I would love to have my book debut with her.

Here are the short stories I've been reading:

Bears Discover Fire by Terry Bisson
The Water That Falls on You from Nowhere by John Chu
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Kwe!

That's one of the few Mi'kmaq words I know. It means "hello." I just started taking language lessons this week. It's gonna be a long road, but any word I learn is a huge level-up, considering I only knew two or three words to begin with.

I had a couple of acceptances yesterday, but I'm not going to count them because their acceptance letters were shady AF. Most of the letter was promotional material, urging me to buy multiple copies of the anthology ahead of time, plus stuffed toys, and, if I am lucky, I might win a prize. While I believe someone will get the prize money, the way this is being run is straight-up scam. Publishers ought not to get all their money and all their product from authors/artists. That is low. So no, I will not be sending more work to Polar Expressions Publishing, and I suggest you avoid it, too. I can see how this would win over someone new to publishing, but your work is worth more than this.

The erotic eco-horror anthology Silk and Foxglove launched yesterday and is available in e-book or trade paperback format. My story "All That Came From Our Lips Were Lilies" is within.

I want to share some of the stories I've been reading with you:

The Cost of Living by Jen Cornick. Creepy tale about the horrors of the working poor. I got to be a beta-reader for this, and it's delicious.

Proof By Induction by José Pablo Iriarte. A thought-provoking story about mathematical proofs, uploaded memories, and grief. This was a Hugo, Nebula, and Locus award finalist.

Love is the Plan the Plan is Death by James Tiptree Jr. This is a surreal story from a unique POV. Who is speaking? WHAT is speaking? And what does it have to say about the nature of love?

And then there's this wonderful Inuit tall tale about Sermerssuaq, the strongest, strangest Inuk woman, ever.
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My writing continues to blot the pages of magazines.

My poem "The Selkie" has been published by Welsh speculative magazine Gwyllion Magazine. This magazine is about Wales-related stories, and is by people with ties to Wales. My paternal great-grandfather was a Welsh lord, but I don't speak the language at all. You will find an echo of his terminology in the poem, though, with my use of the word "landwash" in place of "beach."

My poem "Doctrine of Prosperity" has been published by Rainy Weather Days, a defiant literary magazine. I took some cues from OuLiPo to write this one. I don't recall what my first rendition of this poem was, other than underwhelming. However, when I replaced nouns with words pulled randomly from the Book of Enoch, all of a sudden, my poem had much more oomph.

A few pieces were supposed to be published already, but due to who knows what, still have not made it to print. One anthology is awaiting cover art before it goes to print. Other magazines have had editors going through a variety of challenges. To paraphrase a certain chaos scientist from Jurassic Park, life finds a way ... to make things chaotic.

Speaking of which, although I meant to work on The Development (described by a recent workshopper as "beige gothic"), I ended up drafting a new personal essay about oral history, colonialism, and the extinction of the Great Auk. It's still a bit of a mess, but I think it is going to polish out into something interesting and thought-provoking. At the very least, it is provoking some thoughts in me. I'm dusting off recollections of things I overheard as a little kid while living on the Rock. It also inspired me to look for more writing about witchcraft in Newfoundland, and I ended up buying a copy of Making Witches: Newfoundland Traditions of Spells and Counterspells by Barbara Rieti. I've been reading a chapter on "Indian Witches," which discusses settlers' superstitious beliefs about Mi'kmaq. It seems similar to settler beliefs about Mi'kmaq on the mainland.

All of this is fodder for the historical writing I've been doing incorporating Maritime traditions.

I was recently a storyteller on a horror writers' reading, sponsored by author/editor Mae Murray. There was a good turnout and I think we all had fun. I read my as-yet-unpublished story "Ethel's Bones," which introduces some characters I plan on featuring in a novel I have not yet started to write. I need to finished The Development, first, and then I can get started on a new giant project.

In the meantime, I continue to write short stories. I recently completed a second draft of a new short story tentatively called "Rosalyn and the End of Everything." It's the most heavy-metal story I've ever written. I'm awaiting feedback from an editor before I start sending it off to different places.

I also recently completed a flash fiction about the Dungarvon Whooper, a ghost/cryptid from the Miramichi region of New Brunswick. I sent that story off to a couple of places already. It incorporates Chiac (NB French/English dialect) and Maritimes English vernacular.
shanmonster: (On the stairs)
A while back, I applied for a residency in Costa Rica. The Casa Uno Residency is a highly competitive artist residency, and I made the short list. I had an interview with the host yesterday and learned I am under consideration for placement in January/February.

I officially withdrew from consideration for the residency today. I graduate from the Queer Novel Immersive program at GrubStreet in February. If the residency were just a few weeks later, I would have been able to swing it. Womp womp.

The weird thing is, when I applied for the residency, I had a completely illogical feeling that I would get it. I have no idea why I was so certain, but I really was. Maybe I'm psychic.

I applied for several other residencies, but didn't have the same feeling about any of those. I wonder if I'll make it to the final rounds for any of them. One is in Alaska, one in Switzerland, one in Banff, and the other is online. Another writer I know is also applying for the Banff one. It would be fantastic if we both got it. I've been working with her online for over a year, and I'd love to meet her.

In other news, I recently completed edits for my personal essay "Monsters." It will be published in a special issue of Ex-Puritan. When I received my acceptance letter, the editor called my essay "fucking phenomenal." It's the only time I've ever had an F-bomb in an acceptance letter. An early version of the essay was shortlisted for the Dreaming into Collective Futures contest by Textile Magazine but was not published. I first began work on the piece while working in MT Space's Arts Exchange. "Monsters" is a personal essay showing the deleterious effects of settler colonialism on my life and the life of friends and family. It's a heavy read.

Also, although I did not win The Forge Literary Magazine's flash fiction contest, my story "The Bird Husband" made it to the longlist. Time to send it elsewhere. It is inspired by the story of Nuliajuk/Sedna from Inuit folklore.

I am currently enrolled in a flash fiction course through Workman Arts. I think I'll read "The Bird Husband" to the class today. I hope I will generate even more good stories through the course.

Today I plan on writing the next chapter of my work-in-progress "The Development." It's my gothic tale of southwestern suburban sprawl.

In November, I will be getting caught up on my writing even more, taking a course on subgenres of horror through Alex Davis Events. There are still spaces available if you're interested. I recommend Alex's courses. They're very good, and reasonably priced.

I will also be helping develop a course on flash memoir with Rachel Thompson. I'll be "playtesting" the course to give feedback on it. I've enjoyed her classes, and recommend them. Her Lit Mag Love course is what got me organized and paved the way for my professional writing credits.

In case you're interested, here are my publications for the year, as well as my upcoming publications. The year isn't over yet. Maybe I'll get even more of my work published!

2025 “Half Blood Line” and “To Live a Life More Full.” Forthcoming poetry in Workman Arts Literary Anthology
2025 “If You Listen.” Forthcoming fiction in Terrain.org
2025 “The Qalupalik.” Forthcoming fiction in Flash Fiction Online.
2025 “The Ghosts of Forests Past.” Forthcoming CNF in ALOCASIA
2025 “The Tupilaq.” Forthcoming fiction in Iridescence anthology. January 2025
2025 “The Infective.” Forthcoming fiction in Asylum of Terror: Volume 2 anthology
2025 “The Stolen Language of My Ancestors.” Poetry in IHRAM Publishes: Indigenous Voices - Heart, Hope and Land
2024 “Wolf Mother.” Fiction in Inner Worlds.
2024 “Angakkuq.” Poetry in On Spec. December 2024.
2024 “The Yolk of the Moon.” Fiction in LSUA Flash Fiction Booklet and website.
2024 “The T-Bone.” CNF in The Masters Review
2024 “Daisy Chain.” Fiction in Against the Wall, Under the Armor anthology. December 2024.
2024 “Sirens Don’t Sing Underwater.” Fiction in Moonlit Getaway. December 2024.
2024 “Monsters.” CNF in Ex-Puritan. November 2024.
2024 “Scarred.” Fiction in Meetinghouse Magazine. October 2024.
2024 “The Snow Hath No Queen.” Fiction in MetaStellar. September 2024.
2024 Excerpt from “The Tupilaq.” Fiction in Kinsman Quarterly. September 2024
2024 “A Time For Dolls.” Play in Native Voices: A Literary Collection of Emerging Indigenous Writers.
2024 “The Last Trench.” Fiction in Bitter Become the Fields. Horns and Rattles Press. July 2024.
2024 “Exile of Nuliajuk.” Poetry in Heredity issue of NonBinary Review, June 2024
2024 “Keswick Valley Memorial, 1984,” “This is How to Not Give Up,” and “Salt Water Strider.” Poems in Event Poetry and Prose
2024 “Tom Thumb of the North'' & “Blubber Boy: A Traditional Inuit Tale Then and Now.” Fiction in Mihko Kiskisiwin/Blood Memory: An Anthology.
2024 “Saddles in the Kitchen.” Memoir in Redivider.
2024 “Hiding in Plain Sight: Life With and Without Masks.” Personal essay in Knee Brace Press.
2024 “Saved” and “Wrassling’s Object Lesson.” Poetry in Eavesdrop Magazine.
2024 “Thumbing to Sugar Daddy Oberon.” Short fiction in MetaStellar.
2024 “This is the Time Just Before Spider Woman Meets Kiviuq.” Poetry in West Trestle Review
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My play “A Time For Dolls,” a coming-of-age story with wickedly funny Inuit tales, has been published in Native Voices: A Literary Collection of Emerging Indigenous Writers. I think it’s on sale until the 15th of June, and then prices go up. It’s available on all of the Amazons, I think. It may be coming to other booksellers later this summer.
shanmonster: (Tiger claw)
My memoir essay, "Saddles in the Kitchen," has been published in Redivider.

Here's the opening paragraph:

In the 1970s, my family lived all over New Brunswick before settling down deep in the Appalachian hills of the Acadian forest. Every summer, we journeyed to Newfoundland to visit Dad’s family. I have snippets of memories from my infancy and early childhood. I recall being a baby on a plane with a smoking section, hoisted up to look over the rails of an icebreaker ferry called the William Carson. It sank by the time I turned six. We drove through a place called Blow Me Down where Dad told me the Tabletop Mountains were flat on account of the fierce wind. I camped in a frigid tent on the Avalon Peninsula and peeked through the tent flap to watch a bull moose swim across a moonlit lake ringed by dark conifers. I saw icebergs float like white mountains off the coast of St. John’s. I witnessed herds of Newfoundland ponies running free, the last of a vanishing breed marking the end of an era. I remember being held in my Inuk grandfather’s arms in the passenger seat of a car while he pointed out a waterfall to me. It’s my only memory of him. He died when I was two.
shanmonster: (On the stairs)
My #LandBack vengeance story "The Tupilaq" is a finalist for the Iridescence Awards and will be published in an anthology later this year by Kinsman Quarterly.

My poetry collection "Poemuit" was shortlisted for the QTBIPOC Prize at Kelsey Street Press. I've revised the collection and entered it into another competition. Maybe it'll win this time. One can hope.

I am now a member of the Science Fiction & Fantasy Writers Association and the Canadian Science Fiction and Fantasy Association.

I've been taking horror writing classes and meet with fellow horror writers weekly for a critique group. I'm vibing well with them, and it is very motivating. I'm about 16,000 words into a novella (maybe even a short novel?) about runaway girls and their dog in 1970s rural New Brunswick. It's been a fun ride, and this story never wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for the encouragement of my mentor, Gurjinder Basran.

It's invigorating to have a writing community. I find it hard to keep disciplined in my practice without having someone to share my work with, and it's also great to be able to return that favour.
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I'm still not finished my manuscript. It's hanging there like a loose tooth. So close to being finished, but not quite there. I've been stalled by my health (chronic health conditions are a serious pain in the arse), but I finally finished a chapter which has been stalling me for weeks. Forward momentum has once again been achieved. Onward! This manuscript is sponsored by the Waterloo Arts Fund.

My poem This is the Time Just Before Spider Woman Meets Kiviuq is live on West Trestle Review.

I wanted to apply for the Masters program at Northwestern University, but when I learned they only want a 2,500-word writing sample, that waved a big red flag right in my face. How can they get an idea of someone's breadth of writing in such a small sample? I'm not a one-trick-pony when it comes to writing. I'm a buffet table! I'm a playwright, poet, novelist, essayist, memoirist, and short story writer. I write book reviews, smut, literary fiction, speculative fiction, and uncategorized weirdities. I'm also a proof reader and have experience as a copy and line editor. Though I crave structured learning and mentorship, I will find it another way: possibly through the private sector.

Once a month, I run a co-writing group for Indigenous writers in conjunction with the Indigenous Poets Society. It's been running on the first Tuesday of the month since November. It's a small group, but one I'm grateful for. We get a lot of writing done, and have a fun time with it. If you are an Indigenous writer and would like to write along with us, contact me at shanmonster at gmail dot com. We vet people beforehand to avoid Zoom bombers.

Here are my publications for 2023. I hope I have even more this year!

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My story The Snow Hath No Queen is the winner of the 2023 Dystopian Fiction contest put on by Seminal Edits.

"The winner of this year’s comp is Shantell Powell with The Snow Hath No Queen. A story that combines dystopia and mythology to weave a superb work of prose poetry. That is all I will say. Please enjoy."

[The Snow Hath No Queen by Shantell Powell]

Thanks for feedback from Claudia Casper and Kevin Spenst at TWS at Simon Fraser University, and from Rachel Thompson and the fine folks at Writerly Love. Big thanks also go out to Saraswathi Sukumar and her fairytale workshops.
shanmonster: (Tiger claw)
(I just realized that I somehow didn't include a short critical essay I wrote years ago about Herland by Charlotte Perkins Gilman. Here it is now.)

The Others of Herland

Superficially, Charlotte Perkins Gilman's Herland appears to be a study in contrast between a utopian matriarchy and a flawed patriarchy. The most apparent difference between Herland and the rest of the world is the lack of men in the former, but Herland is not the genial utopia Gilman envisions, but a dystopian colonial society relying upon racial purity to succeed. It is not just missing men: it is missing non-white, “savage” races. The perceived superiority is based upon “othering,” which is a major theme in colonial literature.

“Othering” may be defined as defining/securing positive identity through the omission or stigmatization of an “other” (1). The concept appears early on in the book. When Indigenous guides inform Jennings that many have gone to the hidden civilization, but only one has ever returned, Jennings laughs and says, “I knew the stuff that savage dreams are made of” (Gilman 2). Othering continues when the women's voices are described as “no savage sing-song, but clear musical fluent speech” (Gilman 13). Jennings' racism grows more explicit: “There is no doubt in my mind that these people were of Aryan stock, and were once in contact with the best civilization of the old world. They were 'white'” (Gilman 46). It is not accidental that the supreme virtue of Herland is described as “race-motherhood” (Gilman 119).

By the end of the book, the othering has intensified to a genocidal extent. Jennings says the men make plans of “civilizing—or exterminating—the dangerous savages. That is, we men talked of that last—not with the women. They had a definite aversion to killing things” (Gilman 122). This raises a huge question: what happened to the many who had journeyed to Herland in the past? Jennings and his companions never ask, the women never offer, and this elision cements the story as colonial literature.


1. http://psychology.wikia.com/wiki/Other
2. Gilman, Charlotte Perkins (1998). Herland. Mineola, New York: Dover Publications, Inc.
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I've been busy. I can't share a lot of what I've been working on because of publication issues, however, I can share this.

Yesterday, I had my second in-person reading since about 2017. It went well.

I'm reading four pieces here:

1. Tom Thumb of the North - an Inuit take on the Tom Thumb fairytale.
2. Angakkuq - the story of a shapeshifting grandmother
3. Exile - a pregnant Nuliajuk/Sedna is exiled by her father to a rocky island
4. This is the Time Just Before Spider Woman Meets Kiviuq - a spider woman has an unannounced visitor

shanmonster: (Tiger claw)
Yesterday while I was at the gym, I overheard a young soldier laughing about how his fellow soldiers took a course on Indigenous culture in Ontario. He thought it was funny how not a single one of the soldiers actually read any of the material. Not even one soldier bothered with it, but they all passed the course.

While he laughed, I recalled how a Canadian soldier felt justified in thrusting a bayonet into the chest of a 14-year-old Mohawk girl who was holding her baby sister at the time. I thought about how RCMP officers have been terrorizing and harassing Wet'suwet'en people on their own land multiple times per day for weeks now. I thought about how cops shot at women at 1492 Land Back Lane in 2019 just so they could videotape the aftermath: angry men charging toward the police cruiser afterwards. The footage was released to the media who shared it, no questions asked, without talking to any of the Anishinaabeg or Haudenosaunee people. I remembered how one of the terrified elders there had sent me a text message saying, "They're shooting at us!"

Canada is built on genocide, and government attempts at reconciliation are a joke. It's the worst sort of joke, because it isn't funny.

Over ten thousand graves of First Nations, Metis, and Inuit children have been found at the concentration/re-education camps still referred to by the government as residential "schools," and there are over a hundred more of these child prisons to search. And somehow, Canada still has a reputation as a polite country filled with nice people. And somehow, most Canadians refuse to acknowledge the genocide that is still going on.

There is an apartheid in this country. Indigenous people do not get the same legal protections as other people. Forced sterilization is still taking place, as are birth alerts where Indigenous babies are taken away from their families right after birth and placed in foster care where they are abused, molested, and removed from their culture. The "residential schools" may be closed, but children are still being kidnapped by the government.

There's a trope in movies and books where bad shit always happens on Indian burial grounds. This entire continent is an Indian burial ground. Our bodies are everywhere, and the Prime Minister is still fighting against Indigenous children receiving the same medical care as other children.

Indigenous people live in a post-apocalyptic world.
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The good news is I have officially been accepted into Simon Fraser University's Writers Studio, which is a part-time program comparable to an MFA in writing. I beat out a whole pile of other folks, because there was a lot of competition. I'm still waiting to hear whether or not I am getting a scholarship to help cover the cost of tuition.

The last time I applied for an MFA program was in 1994 when I graduated from the University of New Brunswick. I applied to the University of British Columbia's creative writing department and did not make it. I guess I needed a couple of decades to ripen.

The bad news is I was opening a box of detergent this morning and bent back one of my fingernails so bad that it pulled halfway off the nail bed. Now I have a ripped and bloody nail bed. I also made the most bizarre sound when it happened. It went kinda like "HOOOOOOOO-UHH."

Ouch.

The other bad news is my guts don't feel right, my neck is still an issue (I've been recovering from a bad case of wry neck for the past week and a bit), and I don't know that my body is going to cooperate and let me go to the solidarity march for Wet'suwet'en today. I am all dressed, I have my warrior women flag, but my guts are percolating noisily and that's a long walk with no bathrooms. Damn you, IBS.

shanmonster: (Liothu'a)
Some time ago, an artist was offering a free, online workshop about native plants. I signed up, of course. And when it came to actually attending it, I dearly wish I'd made a reaction video of the whole thing. My face surely went through the gamut of expressions.

Since the workshop was being sponsored by some formal institution or another, a representative opened with a land acknowledgment. The mangled pronunciation of the various First Nations peoples made me cringe. I thought to myself, "Well, at least they're making an effort," and suffered through it. I waited for the part of the land acknowledgment where they say what their organization is doing to honour the treaties and to reconcile with Indigenous peoples, but that part didn't come. It rarely does.

The artist then began their workshop, saying they were new to the area, and had read up a bit on the region's history. They discussed how the particular area was important to people here when the settlers arrived, and how it is important to people here now in a "post-colonial" period.

My brain made a screeching sound. Wait. What? We aren't in a post-colonial period. We are in a straight-up colonial period. The colonizers are still busy colonizing.

Nevertheless, they persisted, repeatedly referencing current times as post-colonial. They talked about how everything was basically just a wilderness before and how the Europeans brought agriculture. They then discussed why they had chosen native plants as a subject: the aesthetic appeal. They then announced with a weird sort of glee that not all the plants were just weeds, because some of them actually have uses as food or medicine. They said that no one really knows this sort of stuff. They said their idea was to make a community project where everyone can come in and do a drawing of one of these overlooked and potentially useful plants, and that maybe everyone could come to see that some are pretty and might deserve a place in nature and a bunch of cockamamie nonsense which takes no understanding of ecology into account and what the fuck my brain was just melting at this point. So I logged off.

This is what casual, everyday, inadvertent racism from nice white people looks like. There was absolutely no consideration of the people who lived here before European contact. There was no mention of how folks were already living in the region (aside from the land acknowledgment), or how those people were incredible gardeners with excellent knowledge of companion planting and permaculture. There was no mention of how those first Europeans were doing so poorly in the region that the First Nations people taught them what foods to eat and what medicines to take out of empathy. There was no mention of how there are still people with that traditional knowledge about native plants. There was no mention of how many of these "weeds" were and still are specifically cultivated for food and medicine. There was no mention of the First Nations people who still live in the region. There was no mention.

A land acknowledgment is not a set of magic words which automagically squares everything up with First Nations, Inuit, or Métis. To me, almost all land acknowledgments come across as "this stuff isn't ours, but thanks for letting us steal the lion's share."



And then there's one of the courses I'm in, now. There was a session held during the National Day for Truth and Reconciliation. The class wasn't postponed until the next week, but American Thanksgiving, a holiday steeped in genocide, is going to be a day off. I can't help but note this. I try not to feel bitter, but I am. At least I get more time to work on my project.

Since Ontario decided not to make the National Day for Truth and Reconciliation a statutory holiday, the bankers and the politicians got the day off, but Indigenous people did not. Although there was an excellent turn-out for the march and the speeches, I know a lot of people who could not afford to take the cut in pay to offer their respects to survivors of genocide and their families. Meanwhile, glorious leader Justin Trudeau went on a fancy resort holiday in Tofino, skipping out on all the tricksy reconciliation bits. I guess he figured he'd already done his bit by staging a photo-op on the graves of dead children earlier in the year.


One of the reasons I left FaceBook was because of the waves of toxicity drowning me. Not only was I seeing hate speech in the comments sections of CBC/CTV/etc. posts, but I was being attacked by people who I thought were my friends. Some frequently questioned my motives for speaking out against racism. One of them, a friend for almost fifteen years, would regularly imply I was being hyperbolic about racism in Canada, that it wasn't nearly as bad here as it is in the US. But it's all the same struggle. All the while, cops continue to assault or murder people in my community. Abuses are happening all over the world to Indigenous peoples. In Canada, racist nurses killed Joyce Echaquan on a livestream. An Elder contacted me in desperation last year because the OPP had opened fire on women in Six Nations. All this time, I was being gaslit by non-Indigenous people.

This guy unfriended me in a fit of pique, but in a last vicious dig, accused me of being gullible, "woker-than-thou", and maybe even a pretendian. He eased up a little on that last one by saying that he looked into me and I seem to be legit.

I don't think I have the words for how violated that made me feel. That some white dude, who I thought was my friend, decided to research whether or not I'm actually worthy of being anti-racist. That he implied I'm a fake. That I'm only pretending to be Inuk because it makes me one of the cool kids.

The only people who have a right to tell me if I'm Inuk or not are Inuit.

I know people who are out on the land, defending land and people and water from acts of war. I do not use the word "war" lightly. The cops being sent in to fix the "Indian problem" come with assault rifles and armoured vehicles and attack dogs. Resource depletion companies are pay-rolling the RCMP. While dead children are being exhumed from unmarked graves, pipelines are buried in their place. RCMP used to kidnap all the children to take them to concentration camps where they were starved and horrifically abused, and more likely to die than a WWI soldier. Now the RCMP are all soldiered-up and attacking Land Defenders. At Fairy Creek, they especially like targeting Indigenous women and trans folks, using sexual violence and pepper spray to make them comply. A couple of days ago, they ran down an Elder at a crosswalk, leaving him lying there and saying that since it wasn't caught on video, it never happened.

A couple of days ago in Wet'suwet'en, they grabbed Logan Staats by his braids, slammed him face-first into the ground, punched him in the ear, and kneed him in the spine. He was hugging a 70-year-old Matriarch at the time, an Elder who'd been denied her heart medication for days by heartless cops. The folks in that community were cut off from the outside world. The RCMP wouldn't even allow their medication to be brought in. Their power, radio, and internet were shut off. They were in their houses, and cops broke their way in with chainsaws and axes. It's right out of a goddamned slasher movie. How would you react to having your house broken into by an ax- or chainsaw-wielding cop?

Many of these stories aren't making it into the news, and this is by design. Journalists are being jailed. Indigenous peoples are under attack. Prepubescent girls are taken from their families, fitted with IUDs, and put into foster care where it is known they will be raped. This is happening. This is the reality in Canada. We are not safe here. We cannot be safe unless we protect one another. I am so grateful for the Land Defenders. They give me hope.

There's a solidarity march tomorrow in uptown Waterloo. I plan on being there. We need to let the people know that we are not going to quietly vanish beneath waves of greed and hate and racism. We are still here, and we're finding peaceable ways of fighting back.
shanmonster: (Liothu'a)
I logged onto a Zoom call a while back in the middle of a conversation between a student and an instructor. The student, who is white, was talking about how their church was working hard at reconciliation, and was recommending lots of books by Indigenous authors for its parishioners to read. While that's cool, what the student said next was a lot less cool. They talked about how they had painted a big portrait of Jesus in the Woodland Art style, and had incorporated all sorts of native art into their painting. Stuff like orcas and bears and totem poles. I didn't say a word. I was too grossed out. Although I have Mi'kmaq ancestry, I was not raised with any of those teachings, and I don't feel like I have the right to create art in the Eastern Woodland Style. And considering Christianity's role in the genocide of Indigenous peoples, I certainly wouldn't be making an Eastern Woodland-style portrait of Jesus and mixing it with a pan-Indigenous array of copied art. That's some serious audacity.

Text about Indigenous emotional labour
Last week, I was in a class on anti-racism that started off well enough, with academic topics introduced, and then breakout sessions with two or three people discussing the concepts for five minutes. But then a video on racism in Canada was shown. The video has excellent information, things newcomers and members of the dominant culture really need to know, but as for the racialized people in the group, the video had little value. It just tore the dressing off unhealed wounds. I was seeing people I know in that video, seeing the cops attack women in Wet'suwet'en, a video that was already seared into my mind. I recalled the cops tearing down the red dresses set up in memorial to missing and murdered Indigenous women and girls, and seeing them trample them into the ground. I saw the faces of people murdered by police and remembered how last year I stopped three police officers from continuing their brutalization of an unarmed woman screaming out for help. I watched violent act after violent act perpetrated by police, security, and the DFO. I saw the destruction of places where I have lived, heard the talking heads, and found myself drowning in wave after wave of colonial violence. And then the video was over, we were broken into groups of three and told to discuss what we'd seen in six minutes. And then goodbye, see you next week.

I felt like I'd been pummelled. Shell-shocked. Filled with words I wanted to scream out to the universe, but there was no time to unload any of them. For the racialized people in the group, the ideas in the video aren't new. They aren't ideas. They are our lived reality. If we haven't been targeted by police, someone in our community has been. I remember the fire keeper from one of the local powwows who was gunned down by cops in Quebec recently. I remember when a matriarch messaged me because the cops were shooting at her friends in Six Nations. The cops did this just to elicit a reaction, so they could film the aftermath and claim the natives were making unprovoked attacks.

Our experience of racism in Canada the good, the squeaky-clean, the excessively-polite, the nation of goofy, genial Mounties--our experience is different than that of the dominant culture. Why did that video need to be inflicted upon us when we would not be given a chance to vent? Wham. Bam. Thank you, Ma'am. No aftercare for us, unless we choose to contact the appropriate people on our own time.

The next session takes place on September 30, the federally-recognized first National Day for Truth & Reconciliation, a day only this year considered to be a federal holiday. It is not being recognized by my school, though. I told the instructors and my fellow students that I would not be attending the class because I will be honouring the survivors and victims of the euphemistically-named "residential schools" (actually concentration camps/reeducation camps). I hoped that the class would also be recognizing this day, would be out there with survivors in solidarity, but instead, I was given a general "please accept our good wishes and know we will be with you in spirit." I know bloody well they will not be with me in spirit. They will be in sessions, discussing something which has nothing to do with the genocide taking place in Canada. I will be expected to catch up on the material in my own time.

This is frustrating and disappointing, and became just one more thing which piled atop a week already filled with stressors. The next day, another stressful thing happened, something I'd normally be able to deal with, but combined with the retraumatizing video foisted upon me the day before, I found myself tumbling headlong into a vicious anxiety attack.

I was able to bring myself back out of it with the tools I've been developing with mental health counsellors, but my psyche still feels a bit bruised. Maybe I should go hiss at cop cars for a bit of catharsis.
shanmonster: (Default)
In July, MT Space paired me up with multidisciplinary artist Salomé Perez. Together, we collaborated and exchanged skills/knowledge. Both of us are eclectic artists with a keen interest in the natural world, so it was a perfect match.

Over the summer, we met several times in person, in our respective gardens, and also walked through the Laurel Creek Conservation Area. I shared my herbalism knowledge as we walked, and we discussed different uses for various plants. We collected grasses, flowers, and pollen for pigmentation and cordage. Salomé is an accomplished crochet artist and embroiderer, and she crocheted and embroidered with natural fibres.

She showed me how to crochet, and I showed her how to do relief printing. Although I didn't end up using crochet in any of my work (so far), Salome used some birch bark for relief printing.

My own relief printing is based on linocuts. I cleaned up some designs I made last year and produced these:

Cleaned-up linocut

Humpback Linocut

Linocut print

Linocut print

Salome did many sketches of the plants we saw on our walks. I went on a camping trip to Algonquin Park and did some drawing from life.

Nature journaling

I also experimented with mixed media and natural materials. I incorporated wasp paper, wasp nest cells, leather, seal skin, butterfly wings, birch bark, and rose petals in my work. I gathered about 12 cups of rose petals from a grocery store parking lot. I made rose water with some, and macerated/simmered the rest to create rose beads. I ended up being most interested with the liquid produced in the latter process, and I used it as ink for this drawing:

Rose ink drawing

In August, I was in preparation for the Indigenous Art Market Kitchener, and I continued to incorporate natural elements for that. I designed a line of earrings made from leather, sealskin, and birch bark.

Sealskin and leather fringe earrings

Leather leaf earrings

Sealskin and leather fringe earrings

Sealskin and leather earrings

Sealskin and leather earrings

Leather and birch bark earrings

Sealskin fringe earrings

I also embroidered some miniature pendants.

Embroidered pendants

Handmade earrings and pendants


I continued playing with textures and contrast.

Birch Rose 1
Rose

Birch Rose 2
Embroidered birch bark

Sting of Pearls 1


Sting of Pearls 2
Sting of Pearls

I continue to play around with another composition. This remains a work in progress.

Work in progress

Work in progress

I have enjoyed working with Salomé, and I anticipate we will continue our collaboration. I have very much enjoyed learning and creating with her, and want to thank both her and the fine folks at MT Space for putting this all together.
shanmonster: (Tiger claw)
I continue writing (almost) daily. And now I'm looking at going back to school. I hope to secure funding for this program: The Writer's Studio at Simon Fraser University. I have a couple of people at the Canada Council for the Arts helping me out with the process.

In other news, I have been accepted into a part-time program run by Yale University in conjunction with Recovery College: Lived Experience Transformational Leadership Academy (LET(s)LEAD). I will be doing course work and working with a mentor on a project for the program. I expect that the things I learn there will be useful for my advocacy work. I never expected to be accepted into an Ivy League school. Neato.

I am also continuing my education with Tungasuvvingat Inuit in Ottawa. I have been learning about such things as human trafficking, how to deal with police, conflict resolution, and traditional Inuit ways of knowing.

Earlier in the summer, I was able to attend the Centre of Indigegogy's session on honouring the land. I enjoyed it, although the material did not seem to include Inuit perspectives.

At the end of the month, I will be making a pilgrimage back to the east coast. I hope to see some folks in Fredericton and Moncton, as well as my parents in PEI. I have obtained my PEI pass, and hope the island does not get shut down again because of the pandemic. If it does, my parents plan on camping with me in NB or NS. Adventure in the time of Covid. I am grateful I am fully vaccinated.

September 4 marks my return to in-person vending. I will be selling my wares at the Indigenous Art Market held at Huron Natural Area in so-called Kitchener. If you're around, won't you come and see me? I almost forget how people work in-person. You can give me a refresher.

[Indigenous Art Market]

February 2026

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