Snow Job

[shanmonster]

I had the option of going home early today because of the blizzard, but I chose to stay. I figured I could get paid for for an additional three hours of work then walk home in the snow, or not get paid and walk home in the snow. I opted for the money and the extra training. So I sat in on three hours of call centre work. The calls were coming in like mad, partially because it's the busy time of day, and partially because there weren't as many workers on the floor because of the inclement weather.

I like blizzards. However, I don't have to drive in them. Quite a lot of the workers live an hour or so out of town, and I don't envy them their white-outs.

In either case, a girl and I both lucked out and got free rides home with the woman I was shadowing. It was awfully nice of her. We stopped to push a stuck car, and when we got back into our vehicle, I was struck by just how fit I am. I exerted myself to push the stuck car, but it was no big whoop. The exertion didn't make me breathe any harder than jogging to the bathroom. However, the driver and my co-worker (both pretty average, physically speaking) were both gasping for breath.

I'm afraid of ever getting in a state of poor fitness. I never want to be that physically weak.

Yesterday, I went on a tour of a luxury hotel, and at the end of the final presentation, the manager gave a quiz. "What's the largest guest room in the hotel?" he asked.

Without any hesitation, I shouted "The Royal Suite!" I was rewarded with a gift certificate for a free lunch buffet for two. Go me! My Reach for the Top experiences have left me in fine form.

In unrelated news, I'm tempted to get my hair dyed deep purple.

And now for your linkage:

Woman Gives Birth to Giant Baby: I figure the father must have been The Friendly Giant.

Man buys nearly 125,000 bottles of wine at auction for $100: Can you say plonk?

Don't click here: If you've ever clicked on something I've said that about, you know I mean it. And of course it isn't safe for work, so don't kid yourself.

Thai elephants get potty training: "Having taught Thailand's elephants to paint, dance and play musical instruments, their Thai handlers are now toilet-training the beasts."

Hurtubise says invention sees through walls: Hmmm. It sounds like something a supervillain would own.

Patches the Horse: I used to have horses/ponies with some similar characteristics, but they were never housetrained.

Eeeeeeeewwwwwwww!: "Apparently, cocaine and spray lube don't mix."

Saved by a crocodile: Who needs Lassie? Whenever the next tsunami rolls around, keep your eyes peeled for a big reptilian rescuer.

Prison Funnies: Some are funny, and some are not. I like it.

Dancer's oily challenge: "A dancer has spoken of the challenge of dancing naked on stage while having olive oil poured over her body." NSFW.

Smile Big Smack Hamster, a Japanese game show skit: I want to see this.

Comments

Regarding the olive oil dancer...

[dskasak.livejournal.com]

Sounds like she could go to Ta-Ze (http://www.ta-ze.com/) to stock up on her dancing needs. And hello there; after seeing the old "Jesus Was Gother Than You" years ago as a link on a BBS, I always wondered where you were on this great Interweb. Now I know.

Re: Regarding the olive oil dancer...

[kamomil.livejournal.com]

My email address still comes up in Google as being on that page. :)

[f00dave.livejournal.com]

Patches is a COUCH POTATOE.

[thatnickguy.livejournal.com]

A friend of mine applied for a job at a fancy restaurant once. I think it was in a hotel, but I'm not 100% sure. Anyway, at one point, a question was asked:

"What do you think is the most expensive chair here?"

The answer? An empty one.

Food for thought. I have no idea why or how, but it may someday yield useful. =p

[balthcat.livejournal.com]

Wow, that *was* particularly repulsive...

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

Toldja!

[balthcat.livejournal.com]

I haven't seen anything quite like that in a while :P

[zombienought.livejournal.com]

Poor maggots.

And poor cannibalistic Patches. Do
you think those two cowboys are gay
lovers?

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

I doubt the burger was made with horse meat, so Patches isn't cannibalistic yet.

I think the cowboys might be gay, but they're also into their pony in a big, big way. I'll bet it's trained to do things which couldn't be put onto a regular news clip.

[rachelbutoh.livejournal.com]

hey a while back you posted a link to a bunch freak show people. it was this endless black and white website. i am doing some research and was wondering if you remember that one. and could you send it to me? thanks

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

Damn. I know the one you mean, but I can't seem to recall any keywords, so my searches have been turning up nothing. If I find it again, I'll let you know.

[rachelbutoh.livejournal.com]

i had a dream that i met you last night. we were roomates in college or something but we never saw each other, in fact i think the first time we met, the semester was over and i was packing up. we were both so busy we were never together. i think you tried to get me to kung fu with you too. i was ready. but the dream ended. funny how lj seeps into the unconcious. anyhoo it was nice meeting you in the dream. i think we would get along if we ever really meet.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

You're welcome to come to kung fu with me, anytime!

I've yet to meet any of my LJ friends in my dreams. I should try to be more outgoing in my sleep.

[thisblogsucks.livejournal.com]

This gives the Japanese omelette a run for its money.

[f00dave.livejournal.com]

Nothing tops the third eels vid, man. Sorry.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

Not for me. I find this one the mildest of the do-not-clicks, but maybe that's just me.