Slap My Bitch Up

[shanmonster]

I just got back from an educational t'ai chi chu'an class. I got to practice a couple of techniques I haven't really used before: elbow strikes and bitch slaps. Well, I don't think they're technically called bitch slaps, but that's what I call 'em. And damn, but they feel satisfying to administer. They're so meaty and LOUD.

I have done elbow strikes before, but it's not something I've ever drilled. Sifu Martin showed me the correct positioning through the shoulders and back, showed me the weight change, and let me have at. I whumped the kick pad good and solid a bunch of times.

Then we went on to the slapping. Now, this technique I've never even tried before. The other students were having trouble with it, but after a few repetitions, were catching on. I listened to his explanation, then went with it. BAM!!! went my first hit. Sifu Martin stood back and said in a mocking, girly voice, "I've never done this before. Can I play? ... SHEESH!!!"

I guess I'm just a natural slapper. What can I say?

Afterwards, he wanted to demonstrate the power of a particular fighting stance to f00dave, and how it was conducive to protecting your abs. I stood in the stance, and Sifu Martin punched me in the gut. No problem. Then he told me to hold a bad stance, and once again, he punched me in the stomach.

I was about to say, "Yes, I felt a significant difference," but he was backing off saying, "Sheesh! What do you do with those abs?"

Yeah. They're strong and hard, even with bad posture.

"Does that come from dance?" he asked.

"Partially. That, kung fu, and Pilates. But I've always had strong abs." Too bad my shoulders are so wussy, hmm?

In other news, no massage for me (aside from a quick one courtesy of Sifu Martin which did help a fair amount). The massage school is closed for exams. Damn.

Now it's time to do some baking!

Comments

I Love That Song...

[real-bethy.livejournal.com]

...but don't tell anyone, it'll ruin my street cred as a dead-white male bashing P.C. thug.

Whatcha baking?

Re: I Love That Song...

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

I'll never tell!

I made this, but used cocoanut milk instead of cow milk. I didn't have enough of the latter. I hope it's good! It looks and smells good!

Re: I Love That Song...

[valkryor.livejournal.com]

That sounds yummy. I must try that when I get a chance.

Re: I Love That Song...

[real-bethy.livejournal.com]

Mmm! Sounds delicious! Let me know how it turns out so I can enjoy it vicariously through you!:)

Re: I Love That Song...

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

The verdict is meh. It's not bad, but there are far better cake recipes out there. Perhaps if melted chocolate was marbled through the cake, it would be more interesting.

Re: I Love That Song...

[real-bethy.livejournal.com]

Well, of course, EVERYTHING is better if there's melted chocolate in it. If my life was marbled with melted chocolate, I'd be a far more interesting person, I'm sure!:)

Hmm...what happens if you warm the cake up and serve it in a puddle of melted chocolate with a little cream and a strawberry? That might resurrect the recipe.

[icedrake.livejournal.com]

Damn! I was about to ask for the location of the t'ai chi school, but then saw you were still/again in Fredericton, and... That killed *that* idea. But please, let me know if you find a worthwhile one in KW (other than Steve Higgins, who was sadly beyond my price range at the time). My last sifu was a PostDoc student at UW who simply got too busy to teach...

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

There is a school in Toronto, but there's no Wu school in K-W. The sifus say they'll try to find me a recommended group to study with, though.

[issi-noho.livejournal.com]

Um, does 'slapper' have the same connotations in Canada as in the UK (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slapper)?

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

Nope. It's not part of North American vernacular. Few people around here would know understand any of the following:
-minge
-minger
-gets on my tits
- bum a fag (well, a few more would understand, but it's not North American terminology)

I love the variety contained in the English language!

[nymphie.livejournal.com]

Wow! Can I wash my laundry on those abs of yours? ;)

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

Sure, if you don't mind getting your clothes all sweaty!

[nymphie.livejournal.com]

Hmmm, that might be counter prodictive :).