Mars Attacks

[shanmonster]

I woke up at 3:30 this morning. What the fuck?

So I'm going to make a quick post, and then see if I can catch a little bit more sleep before my day starts for real.

The other day, I was embroiled in a terrifying piece of ignorance. While in a class, the instructor said, "Did anyone get up early this morning to watch the eclipse?"

A few people were surprised there was an eclipse. A few others were like, "Oh, shit! I forgot!" And a few were like me, and would rather have the sleep.

The instructor continued. "Yes, it was the closest Mars has ever been to earth. It was thirty-four miles away from earth! It's normally thousands of miles away."

While I blinked and imagined massive gravity freak-outs and the sky blotted out by a red planet, the rest of the class made whoa-that's-cool sounds.

A moment passed, and I cleared my throat. "Mars was not thirty-some miles from the earth."

"Yes, it was."

"If that were the case, why didn't the scientists wait to send out the rover? They could have reached it in less than an hour, and if it got lost, they could have just popped by in the shuttle to find it themselves."

She blinked, and looked at me like I'd grown another head. "No, it really was that close."

I figured there was no point in pushing the point, so I gave up and went back to being a good little dance student.

Still, thirty-four miles?

Comments

[potbelly13.livejournal.com]

I woke up at 2:38 a.m. and have not yet fallen back to sleep. I gave up and got out of bed at 5:45. I figure the reason I can't sleep is because it's the after effects of the full moon, the eclipse and of course Mars being only 34 miles away from the earth. (What was course was she teaching?)

[sockatume.livejournal.com]

Wow. That's... wow.

Assuming you don't already read it, the Bad Astronomer (http://www.badastronomy.com/)'s blog had its yearly debunking of a similar but substantially less crazy version of that story.

[featheredfrog.livejournal.com]

Not the first time I've heard that nonsense, either. I think some "reporter" got the facts messed up when Mars DID pass closely (the number 34 MILLION miles sticks in my memory), two or three years ago.

Some orbit-mechanical thing where Earth and Mars were lined up, Earth at it's farthest from the sun at the same time Mars was at it's closest.

Those who have told me this piece of news have uniformly resisted logic as well. People! There's a thing called a SANITY CHECK. USE IT!

[zombienought.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's because of this forwarded piece of
crap.

http://www.snopes.com/science/mars.asp

I've gotten it forwarded to me like 3 times in
the past five years -- which is a lot consid-
ering that I've told everyone not to send me
forwards.

Thirty-four vs thirty-four million. What's the
difference?

It's good to know that Canadians are beginning
to lose critical thinking skills just like
their neighbours to the south.

[xhappyx.livejournal.com]

Hey I woke up at 3 this morning. I hated it, and am really tired now from tossing and turning all night. Bleh...

With the eclipse I totally missed it... My mom said she woke up in time to view it though.

[tlatoani.livejournal.com]

I weep for humanity.

Absurd!

[(Anonymous)]

That's one of the most absurd things I've read! Just because you wake up at 3:30 am doesn't mean
that you have to get out of bed. Duuuuh!

[greyanna.livejournal.com]

34 miles...wow...I love how people A) don't listen to the crap that is coming out of their mouth, even when someone points it out to them and B) believes everything on the news.

[entropy156.livejournal.com]

I'd say that instructor should have her credentials removed. And perhaps her opposable thumbs.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

Naa. She's still a good dance instructor. But just because she can dance doesn't mean she can reason.

[sorceror.livejournal.com]

Eclipse? That isn't an eclipse.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

It is when Mars passes between the moon and the earth, I suppose.

[tdj.livejournal.com]

Math, people. Use it.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

But isn't that exploitative?

[tdj.livejournal.com]

Math likes it.

[firelie.livejournal.com]

34 miles huh? Well shit, I should've hopped in my space-mobile and taken a quiet morning drive over to Mars and had breakfast on the Southern Highlands...If only I'd known.

[starsorstreet.livejournal.com]

Dear god. I am just... stunned.

[miami-pony.livejournal.com]

Can you bring me to your next dance class? I want to see what someone looks like when they're that stupid. Can I point at her and laugh? I promise I won't get you into trouble :)