(no subject)

[shanmonster]

I remembered! I remembered! Yes, I can now open my lock, and the numbers I thought it were were way off base. I think the number I was thinking of was for a previous lock. Go figure.

Weights don't make sense today, given my schedule, but I'll do them tomorrow. Today is a day of dance, with three or four hours of shaking my arse around: hiphop, lyrical, then learning the choreography for "Thriller." You see, snowy_kathryn is organizing Thrill the World for Kitchener.

On Saturday, I have another big day, with dance all morning (an ATS workshop with Les Trib'elles), a much-needed nap if I can swing it, and then weapons training in the early evening, more dance throughout the night with Khafif and company, and then I think I'm off to play let's-pretend until the wee hours.

In the meantime, I've been making like a housewife and cleaning the hell out of the apartment, because not every hour of the day can be fun and excitement. I've got to keep myself centred (and the place smelling decent), you see.

...

From la Comtesse deSpair comes this romantic piece of history:

Bertrand de Born (1140-1214) was a French troubadour who expressed his love of battle in this touching verse:

My heart is filled with gladness when I see
Strong castles besieged, stockades broken and overwhelmed,
Many vassals struck down,
Horses of the dead and wounded roving at random.
And when battle is joined, let all men of good lineage
Think of naught but the breaking of heads and arms,
For it is better to die than be vanquished and live. . . .
I tell you I have no such joy as when I hear the shout
"On! On!" from both sides and the neighing of riderless steeds,
And groans of "Help me! Help me!"
And when I see both great and small
Fall in the ditches and on the grass
And see the dead transfixed by spear shafts!
Lords, mortgage your domains, castles, cities,
But never give up war!

Culled from: A Distant Mirror.

...

Links? Sure. Don't mind if I do.


London’s Harrods hires cobra to guard 62,000 pound shoes: If nothing else, it makes for a great photo op.

Artist Opens First Plant Porn Theater: "It is very boring but that is part of the essence of pornography, that it is very repetitive."

Graphic Exchange: A selection of imaginative graphic projects (thanks, f00dave).

Super Mario: I've never seen anyone play guitars like this before. Wow (thanks, doyce).

Shock Absorber Bounceometer: This sports bra page contains some very entertaining (and NSFW) animations of what boobs look like during exercise nude, in a regular bra, and in one of the fancy sports bras. It's completely unrealistic but entertaining.

oldermaleanamia's first video: A 65-year-old anorexic man puts together a "thinspiration" video for all those people out there aspiring to get themselves eating disorders. If you think this is just plain ridiculous, read all the gushing praise and thanks in the comments and weep. "Wow, 65 yrs old? You're a few years younger than my grandpa. This video made me realize that people of all ages and gender CAN get an ED..."

You Likely Won't Want to Click Here: Unless, as warrenellis says, you want to see "Ramming a steel rod through my scrotum and pierced penis, making it look kind of like a dead, impaled baby alien." Must I say this is NSFW? I didn't think so.

Arrested For Salting A Police Officer: Although I don't think putting too much salt on someone's burger is a very nice thing to do, neither do I think it's something that should land you in jail.

Vulva: Umm, NSFW, unless you're in the... Never mind. It's just plain NSFW. "The precious vaginal odour filled into a small glass phial. The phial is shaken gently, only a tiny amount of the precious, organic substance is applied onto the back of the hand...and the irresistible smell that exudes from a sensuous vagina immediately intensifies your erotic fantasies and starts the film rolling in your head..."

Comments

62,000 pound shoes!

[montecristo.livejournal.com]

No poor woman could possibly even move in shoes that heavy! Obviously, this is just one more example of the sexual enslavement of women by the patriarchy!

Re: 62,000 pound shoes!

[sockatume.livejournal.com]

It's the fashion for neutronium this season which is responsible. I can only hope the craze ends before someone shifts onto using black holes.

[real-bethy.livejournal.com]

Kat and I decided that there should be a cologne called "Unter Bag" - complete with an umlaute shaped like testicles...with little hairs poking out.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

Yum.

[freakwoman.livejournal.com]

don't you be smack taking the shock absorber Shan! Its my sports bra of choice - the wild painful looking motions they show are pretty accurate to what happens to my boobs if untamed during running and jumping activities - one of these days we can trade racks and you can check it out :P. My good old Super Shock Absorber takes the pain out of jogging, and gumdo - well the boob pain anyway. Now I just need one for my knee.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

You misunderstand me.

The movements don't look painful or wild enough, at least not with the nekkid demonstrations. If your nekkid boobs stop jubbling halfway up your chest while you're doing jumping jacks, you're lucky! I've seen zaftig women take a hit to the chin!

[freakwoman.livejournal.com]

Luckily my boobs are still pretty firm for their dimensions, so I can't actually hit myself in the face. I do some pretty good stripper tricks with em though!

[miami-pony.livejournal.com]

if you think that Asian guy playing 2 guitars at once is cool, look on YouTube for videos tagged "chapman stick" What he's doing with those 2 guitars can be more efficiently done with one Chapman stick: 10 strings, no plucking or strumming.. just tapping.