Fuck Off

[shanmonster]

On the way home, I told an old man to fuck off.

This is not typical behaviour for me. However, this particular old man was following me on his bicycle, swearing at me, glowering at me, and generally acting in a very aggressive and threatening manner. He passed me on his bike and stopped at an intersection, turning around to wait for me. Wary, I stayed back from him, and when he turned around and started walking his bike toward me, I told him in my Scary Voice, "Leave me alone."

He said, "I'm sorry," and kept walking toward me.

This is where I continued the Scary Voice and said, "Fuck Off."

He apologized again, but by that time the light was green and I had zoomed off.

Once upon a time, I would have said, "Oh, that's ok" when someone like that had apologized. Not this time. I was set to thump him one. He had a pretty crazed look about him, and there was no way I was letting him get any closer.

....

I am looking forward to being inhospitable and antisocial. It is nice to no longer have house guests. I am now free to be as vulgar as I like for a bit. I'm waiting for the relief to hit....

Tonight, I'm going to vegetate, belch, sprawl, fart, and watch terrible movies. Vulgarity is sometimes the high point of life.

Comments

[miami-pony.livejournal.com]

Don't they have bicycle cops around that area? You should describe this solid-state fart to the cops so they can throw a scare into him.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

I didn't see any. And I didn't look to closely at him: old, thin man on a bike with a malevolent cast wearing plaid sounds pretty generic.

[klappy-katie.livejournal.com]

"describe this solid-state fart to the cops"
This term made me laugh out loud. Thank you. (and I agree)

[entropy156.livejournal.com]

Well done, indeed! I belive you may have sparked something there. I propose that we designate every September 24th "International Tell An Old Man To Fuck Off Day"! I postulate that there are literally thousands, if not millions, of old men out there that are in desperate need of being told to fuck off and, further, that need is being underserved due to inexplicable manners-related constraints. What better way to reverse this disturbing trend than with a festive holiday?!

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

I believe this is the first time I've ever told a complete stranger to fuck off, and it was certainly the only time I've ever been hostile to the elderly. I haven't had any call for it, before.

[entropy156.livejournal.com]

I can fix that! Your sister lives in San Diego, right? Visiting her will involve some amount of driving in Soutern California, where I live as well. One day of that and you'll have every motivation in the world to tell elderly people to fuck off. I had to hit my brakes so hard today I thought the car was going to flip end over end.

Come visit and I promise that within 12 hours you'll be designing "International Tell An Old Man To Fuck Off Day" greeting cards in your head...

[sol-invictus-99.livejournal.com]

I cannot stand persistent people like that. As a man, I don't have to worry about feeling threatened, but I certainly appreciate the irritation of being solicited/followed. Yesterday, my girlfriend and I went to the county fair, where a bunch of people kept trying to sell us water coolers, and some other idiots tried to take our picture. I told them brusquely, "Do not take my picture," they said, "awe, come on man - where's the love? Don't be so serious." Damn hippies. And then, every time I walk into the 7-Eleven here, someone asks me for change. I mean, I believe in being charitable, but after a while I get sick of people who don't even look poor at all being complete freeloaders.

Living in the city has hardened my heart a bit, and lately, my favorite word has been "No" But I am sure you will agree that the sheer variety of degenerates out there is astounding.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

He wasn't trying to solicit me. I believe he was trying to intimidate/frighten me. He very nearly had himself a tussle. If he'd come any closer, I was prepared to throw down my bike and engage in battle mode. I'm glad it didn't come to that.

[real-bethy.livejournal.com]

Why does everyone always pick on the hippies?!:)

[ltmurnau.livejournal.com]

You did the right thing. You don't have to be polite to anyone who swears at you or deliberately and repeatedly acts in a threatening way towards you.

[real-bethy.livejournal.com]

Okay, G-d forbid that anyone should *ever* attack you...but could you imagine what that old guy would have thought if he pulled something on you? His last thoughts would have been: "Oh fuck! This girl has killed me five times before I hit the ground!"