A Time For Dolls

[shanmonster]

A girl sits on the floor, playing with a doll and singing to it. The doll is bone wrapped in leather and fur. An older woman walks in and watches her.

Mother: (addresses audience) A child is a blessing. Not every woman gets with child, and not every baby survives a winter. Her father made her the doll. He carved it from the rib of a caribou years ago, after she survived her second winter. A winter is a hard thing. Not every child lives so long. And every winter, others die, too. Children, women, men. Some of all.

The girl looks up at her mother.

Mother: Dolls are important.

Daughter: I made the dresses.
Mother: (Looks to daughter when she hears her speak and nods)

Daughter: I clothed my doll myself. I learned to sew intestines without ripping them. I softened the leather with my teeth. Tell me a story, Mother. Tell me of the bad times.

Mother: (Sits down) Blizzards covered over the breathing holes in the ice. The seals didn't come. There were no whales. It was a terrible time of starvation. It was past time for the village to migrate.

Daughter: Where did they go?

Mother: The village followed the distant barking of a fox, but they left behind those who were too weak to move. They told the ones they left behind that when they found food, they'd bring it back. They promised, knowing that there was a probability that few, if any, would survive. It was a tearful time, but if they didn't leave the weak behind, they would all perish.

Daughter: Who stayed behind?

Mother: The old. The sick. A mother fat with child, but gaunt as dried fish. All were starved and weak. … Daughter, you are no longer a child. Your first blood has come, and you must put away your doll.

Daughter: No, no, mother. Not just yet, please. Tell me what happened to the ones who were left behind.

Mother: The oldest and the sickest were the first to die. They gave what they had to the young mother. A scrap of dried fish. A piece of hide. A worn-out mukluk. But the blizzards worsened and they were sealed up in their igloos, too weak to chip away and dig themselves out. They died in their icy tombs, tucked beneath hides which could no longer keep them warm. The mother was sealed up alone in her igloo, too. She was alone save the little one kicking her from the inside. I guess the baby kept her warm enough to live, somehow.

Daughter: Did she have her baby?

Mother: (sighs) It is hard to give birth. It is harder still for one who is starving. How can you have the energy to squat if you have not eaten? How can you have the energy to hold your legs up and open if you fall onto your back? How can you push when you have used up your strength eating old mukluks?

Daughter: Did she live?

Mother: The birth was not an easy one. How could it be? But the baby did come out eventually, born into darkness, in the long night, without even a coal or an ember to provide light. She wouldn't light the lamp. She pulled the baby to her nipple, but her breasts were withered things, and it seemed they contained dust instead of milk. The smell of her own blood made her stomach groan like a walrus. It had been a long time since she had eaten. Too long. The smell crazed her. In the darkness, she lapped up the blood. In the darkness, she devoured her placenta.

Daughter: And then?

Mother: It kept her for a while. She was weak. She never lit the lamp. She didn't want to see her child. The baby was weak and frail, and she had nothing to feed it. She was still famished. And so, in the darkness, she ate all that had come from her. And when we came back with the meat we had found, it was too late. When we came, we brought light, but she would not open her eyes. We could not blame her. It would not have lived. She could not feed it. We saw the tiny bones.

Daughter: She ate her child?

Mother: (nods)

Daughter: Oh.

Mother: She did not move again. She sat as though paralyzed, frozen in one place, eyes always closed. She lived for a time, when we fed her. But… Your time for dolls has passed, daughter.

Daughter: Tell me another story.

Mother: Of the bad times?

Daughter: Are there other times?

Mother: (Laughs)

Daughter: How am I to learn from the good times? It is the hard times which are the best teacher.

Mother: You will learn from everything, if you pay close enough attention. Like from your doll.

Daughter: Yes, like from my doll. I stitched the moccasins closed, double-checking every stitch. Cannot let the water and the cold in. Must be warm and dry, even with such tiny shoes. And I trimmed the ruff on the parka with wolverine fur so breath would not frost.

Mother: You have done well. To sew such small things is important, but it is time to put them away.

Daughter: Not yet. (Gets up) Tell me more.

Mother: You should know to listen to your elders.

Daughter: I do, mother. And to the shaman.

Mother: Yes, the shaman. Another story, then. There was a man and a woman. They tried and tried, but could not have a baby. They had sex often. They had sex so much that they would lie sore and chafed and panting. The mother would lie naked in the summer with her vulva exposed to moonlight, but her womb did not quicken. The moon would impregnate all the other women, but never her. It seemed that everyone had families. Some old grandmothers even had a dozen children, but she had none. The Moon only paid enough attention to make her bleed a little from time to time, but her belly never bore life.

Daughter: The moon?

Mother: Yes. The Moon Man was brother to the first woman with a vagina. His sister was the Sun. In all the world, they were the only ones who had anuses. Though she had a vagina, they were brother and sister, so it was not right that they chose one another. They did not know that they alone were blessed in the world.

Daughter: How did other people shit?

Mother: They didn't. They couldn't eat like you or I. Anyway, Sun Woman and Moon Man decided they wanted to take mates, so they went for a walk and they found a village. Outside the igloos were lumps of suet and caribou meat. But the people would suck on the meat and fat and spit it out since there was no other way to get rid of it.

Daughter: How were there people if there were no vaginas?

Mother: Babies were always cut from the womb with a knife, since there was no other place for them to come out. Then they were sewn back up again with caribou sinew.

Daughter: That's crazy!

Mother: No, it's true.

Daughter: (shakes head, skeptical)

Mother: So Moon Man and Sun Woman journey to this village and make friends with the people there. Eventually, they find the ones they want to marry. Sun Woman finds a man, and before too long, she gets pregnant. Moon Man finds a woman, but when they get married, he discovers the awful truth. She has no vulva. But he doesn't worry. He takes a knife, and carefully, he puts it between her legs and makes an incision.

Daughter: (crosses legs) Ah!

Mother: (laughs) She bled a little, of course. All women do. But the bleeding stopped, and she had a vulva and vagina. But Sun Woman is the first to give birth. Her water breaks, and without needing a knife to help, a baby comes out. It is the first baby to ever have genitals and an anus. The people of the village are amazed, and decide they want this for themselves, too.

Daughter: I'll bet! What did they do?

Mother: The women began to sing and dance, singing praises, and they grabbed knives and sliced their crotches open. Lo and behold, they all got vaginas and vulvas.

Daughter: (laughs)

Mother: Then everyone, men and women, grabbed forks and stabbed themselves in the middle of the rump. Those who got the right spot grew anuses.

Daughter: That sounds like quite a party.

Mother: A wild one, for sure. Everyone could eat--really eat--and swallow their food. And there was much loving, too, now that women knew they had a better way to get the babies out.

Daughter: There must have been a lot more people, after that.

Mother: Oh yes. The villages had to scatter across the land, so there would be enough for everyone to eat. Things are much calmer, now.

Daughter: What happened to the man and the woman who couldn't make a baby?

Mother: I was just getting to that. The woman would lie on the ground with her vulva exposed to the moon, but the moon didn't pay her any heed. The woman was desperate for a baby. She would get her husband to pretend to be one, holding him in her arms and rocking him while he suckled her breasts. But it was no good. It just wasn't the same at all. Finally, the woman begged her husband to go find the shaman. The man promised to do so. He set off in his kayak across the big bay. The trip was long, and he didn't find anything to eat. He did find the shaman, though, on the distant shore.

Daughter: Did the shaman know what to do?

Mother: Oh yes, she did. She had great powers. She got them many years before when she was struck by lightning. She was frequently successful at helping barren couples have babies. Anyway, the husband came to her, and she listened to his problem.

Daughter: (holds the doll to her breast, rocking it)

Mother: The shaman held out two dried fish. If you want a boy child, she said, give your wife this fish. And if you want a girl child, give your wife this fish.

Daughter: He must have jumped back into his kayak and set off right away.

Mother: Mmhmm. Off he went, paddling as fast as he could, but it was a long way, and he was awfully hungry….

Daughter: Oh no. He didn't….

Mother: He sure did! He had another day's journey, yet, and still no sign of any food. So he took a fish in either hand and weighed them, and decided it wouldn't be so bad if he ate one of them. After all, he didn't need two children, right now. One was enough. After a bit of thought, he decided he'd rather have a boy, so he put the boy fish away and ate the girl fish.

Daughter: I know what happens next. He gets a big belly, doesn't he?

Mother: First, he felt a cramp, and then he felt awfully sick, but it wasn't seasickness. The water was calm. He didn't throw up, but it was a close call. He was pretty desperate to get home, now, and he paddled as fast as he could, home to his wife.

Daughter: (laughs)

Mother: By the time he got home, his belly grew so big, his wife had to help pull him out of the kayak. He's wedged in good and tight! And once he was out, he had to waddle with his hand pressed to the small of his back. His belly was huge!

Daughter: His wife must have been awfully surprised.

Mother: Yes, but she knew he was going to have a baby, so she knew how to take care of him. She cared for him day and night, and one day, a baby passed from him, sliding out like a fish, plopping out into the cold air, caught in the wife's hands. (Walks over to the daughter and gives her a hug.) The husband and wife loved their little girl very much. What did it matter if the man was a mother, too?

Daughter: Wait…. You're not saying that father is my real mother, are you?

Mother: (winks) Maybe he is. Maybe he's not. I won't say. Either way, we love you.

Daughter: Tell me a funny story, mother.

Mother: That one wasn't funny enough for you?

Daughter: It was funny, but I know you know more like that. Do you know the one about the giant who loved humans?

Mother: No, I don't think I know that one.

Daughter: This is a good one. There once was a giant. He was huge and green. He was so big, that when he was thirsty, he could drain an entire lake in a few gulps. And when he farted, there would be big windstorms.

Mother: That is big!

Daughter: He was married to a bright green giantess. She was just as big as him, but he really liked humans better. He thought they looked much better, being so small and finely featured. He and his wife lived close to a human village, and he was friends with a man there. The man had a beautiful wife, and the giant watched her every day, falling more and more in love with her. One day, he asked the man if he'd be interested in swapping wives, just for one night. The man said he didn't mind, but would ask his wife what she thought of it.

Mother: She couldn't have wanted to.

Daughter: That's what you'd think, but she was much more pretty than she was smart, so it didn't take long for her to be convinced it might be fun.

Mother: Oh no.

Daughter: Oh yes. Although the man hadn't really thought of it before the giant planted the suggestion in his mind, now he just couldn't stop thinking about the giantess, and her huge green genitals. He imagined swimming in that deep warm pool, and off he went. He dove right in, but got sucked up inside and was never seen again.

Mother: And the woman?

Daughter: Well, her fate was no better. The giant took her in his hand, as gently as he could, and gazed at her in adoration. When he sighed, her hair blasted back from her face. But no matter how gentle and kind the giant tried to be, the end result was not good. She was split right in half.

Mother: Augh!

Daughter: But it wasn't all bad. It made the giant realize just how perfect for him his wife was, and when they kissed afterwards, the ice floes cracked. And when they rolled together naked, the whole ground shook.

Mother: (laughs) After a story like that, I know more than ever that it is time for you to put your doll away.

Daughter: Just one more story, mother?

Mother: Very well. One more.

Daughter: Thank you.

Mother: There once was a young woman. Her face was round, and her black hair sleek as a seal. She loved a young man and they were to marry. But one day, he did not come back from a fishing trip. The others said he had fallen from the fishing boat and had drowned.

Daughter: That's sad.

Mother: She was very sad, but secretly, she didn't believe he was dead. Every day, she'd watch the water, waiting for his return, but he never came back. Everyone felt sorry for her, and they gave her a big hunk of muktuk, blubber, to keep her strength up. Blubber has the power of life. It is both food and lamp oil. She thanked the people for their gifts of kindness, and she saved up the blubber.

Daughter: (combs the doll's hair)

Mother: Eventually, suitors began to call on her. After all, she was young and beautiful, and no matter what she thought, her lover was not coming back. But when she looked at these earnest young men all she could see was the deep black chasm of ocean that separated her from her beloved.

Daughter: What did she do with the brick of blubber?

Mother: While she was alone one night, and feeling his loss most keenly, she took the blubber and began to carve it to look like his face. It wasn't very big, but she was meticulous, and it was a good likeness. It was so good, that she decided to carve the rest of him, too. And as she carved him, she remembered little details about him.

Daughter: Then what?

Mother: Then she remembered lying in his arms. She remembered making love to him. And she closed her eyes, and she took the blubber boy she had made, and she began to rub it on herself, down between her legs. And something happened. The blubber boy began to grow. First it was the size of your doll. Then a child. And the more she rubbed, the more it rubbed back, and the more it grew, until it was the same size as her lost one. And she rubbed faster and faster, and when she finally cried out in joy, he cried out, too. Her blubber boy had come to life.

Daughter: Blubber boy was real.

Mother: Yes, as real as you and I. The other people all thought it was a miracle. He had died. They were sure of it. Yet, here he was, walking amongst them, smiling, and no one smiled more than the young woman. They were married the very next day.

Daughter: She married muktuk?

Mother: She did. They kept using it when they had sex. Blubber made things soft, smooth, and slippery. It was their secret, and they told no one. Eventually, their stores of food began to run low, and blubber boy said he'd need to go fishing again.

Daughter: Oh...

Mother: She did not react well to this, but they could not live on love alone, and so off he went, on the very same fishing boat his predecessor had fallen from. Blubber girl was frightened. She didn't want to lose him again.

Daughter: Did he drown?

Mother: No. Blubber cannot drown. But while he was fishing, the hot sun beat down on him, and since he could not sweat, he began to melt. Now he was frightened. As fast as he could, he paddled back to shore. His heart was beating twice as fast as it should, he was so scared. And dripping away, he ran back to the igloo. When he made it home, he was half the size he should have been. Blubber girl packed him in snow, and once he was cool and no longer melting, she began to rub him again until he grew back to full size.

Daughter: He got big again. Good.

Mother: Yes, he did, but he never recovered from his fear. From then on, he was too afraid to work too hard, lest he melt. No longer would he go fishing or hunting. And so blubber girl had to do all of these things. Although she loved him and never begrudged him, he had become a burden. He was now even afraid of the very thing that had brought him to life.

Daughter: That…. That is not the best story I've ever heard.

Mother: Fine. I'll tell you the tale of the boy who carried fish home in his stomach.

Daughter: In his stomach?

Mother: Yes. Listen. This boy wanted to be a man. He lived with his grandmother, and one day, when the weather was calm, she asked him to walk along the beach to see if he could find any fish. And so he began to walk in the shallows. He had gone quite a long way when he saw a tommy cod. He darted his hands into the water and grasped the wriggling fish. It was slippery, and he was scared he'd drop it, but he had nothing to hold it in. So he opened his mouth wide and swallowed the fish whole and live. He could feel it writhing around in his throat, and then swimming around in his stomach.

Daughter: (makes a face)

Mother: But the tommy cod wasn't all he found. On his walk, he found more fish. He found a trout, a couple of white fish, and a big salmon. All these he swallowed down. Then he found a humpback, and he swallowed that, too.

Daughter: He did not swallow a whale.

Mother: He did, but it wasn't easy. And every time he swallowed something, it left a ring of taste in the back of his throat. The next thing he saw was a seal, but he pulled its whiskers off before swallowing it.

Daughter: I suppose, those would get stuck in his throat.

Mother: Naturally. He found a beluga, and a baby whale, too. All of these he swallowed, and then he decided he'd better get back home to his grandmother. His belly was huge and distended, by this time. It was too big for him to walk. It was resting on the ground in front of him. He tried walking backwards, but it dragged too heavily on the ground, and kept getting caught on rocks.

Daughter: What did he do?

Mother: Well, first he tried throwing it over his shoulder like a sack, but that didn't go too well. It was just too heavy and uncomfortable. He stopped by a pond to get a drink, but with the extra water, it just made everything in his belly swim around even more, and now he had bad stomach cramps on top of everything else. He hurt so badly, he was in tears. He managed to get himself back to the shore, and dragged his stomach out into the water until he floated and bobbed in the waves. He kicked off with his feet, and floated and bounced his way back to his grandmother's igloo.

Daughter: I don't see how this can end well, mother.

Mother: Oh, it does. His grandmother is astonished to see her grandson floating back, and she tries to drag him into the igloo, but his stomach is just too big to get through skylight, entryway, or window. Fortunately, the grandmother knew how to use magic, and she sat him beside a fire until a spark flew out and landed on his stomach. The skin was stretched so thin that the spark burned right through, and all the fish came slithering out in a big gurgle. And there they sat, surrounded by enough food to last them for the entire winter. Grandmother stitched his stomach closed again with caribou sinew, and declared him a man.

Daughter: Yes, he was a man. … You are right, mother.

Mother: About what?

Daughter: I am a woman, now. (looks at doll closely, turning it every which way) I sewed all the clothes for my doll. I used stitches finer and smaller than I'll ever have to do for my own clothes. Though the doll has no arms, I used the skin of ground squirrels forelegs to make sleeves. I'll never need to sew anything so small again.

Mother: No, you won't. You'll have bigger things to make.

Daughter: I checked everything I made twice. Three times. I crimped the shoes with my teeth. I wasted no leather. Poor sewing can mean death. I sewed well, didn't I, mother?

Mother: You did.

Daughter: (holds doll out to her mother)

Mother: (begins taking the clothes off the doll, and folding and wrapping them neatly away)

Daughter: (brings hands down to her crotch) The moon looks upon me now.

Mother: (smiles)

^{Copyright 2011 to Shantell Powell}

Comments

[dj-fos.livejournal.com]

This show was amazing.

I would seriously suggest you tack a copyright notice somewhere on this posting. Copyright is inherent for something you wrote, but it is a good idea to state it matter-of-factly with a date attached.

[elanya.livejournal.com]

That is really cool, Shan! I would have liked to see it :)