What the Fuckage

[shanmonster]

My head is filled with snot, but at least I'm mobile, today! I even managed to get all my hinges soldered on my necklace today. Tomorrow morning, I shall attempt yet another lost wax casting. I sure hope it works. I'm getting really tired of fucking up.

And now, here are some links to make you exclaim blasphemously, or at least with reference to procreational activities.

It's not every day I get to see a family photo album with a caption like Clara hams for the camera while mom delivers the placenta in the background. This just cements even more firmly my desire to never sprog.

By now, you know placenta makes a pretty decent lasagna. But did you know it's also an excellent art medium?

Ok, so we've had the birth and the afterbirth. What do we do with the child? I say we gag it to keep it from crying.

Yes, I know you're sick of Janet Jackson's tit. But did you know that Jackson tits are tasty treats? It reminds me a bit of the Mitsou boob cupcakes that were being sold in Quebec about ten years ago.

Getting back to safer ground, check out this nifty, nerdy Klein Bottle Hat (with matching Moebius scarf).

Comments

[fourcorners.livejournal.com]

That childbirthing stuff was kind of icky. It didn't help that she was unattractive. The very idea of consuming the placenta in some baked food doesn't sit well with me.

[montecristo.livejournal.com]

Hey! It's another book-cover icon for curtana!

[minstrel70.livejournal.com]

I always knew there was something a little funny about that Satan guy...

I'm all for the miracle of birth and I'm sure it was a wonderful experience for that family, having the baby at home, but frankly I could've done without that photo montage...

[glowkitty]

the scary thing is, only two of those links were not previously visited by me in the last week, according to internet explorer.

i need to get out more.

[nymphie.livejournal.com]

I must post child- links in the [Unknown site tag] community! They will love them!

why, oh why

[dancing-gator.livejournal.com]

Why would they post something like that on the web! ACK! That was gross. Doesnt help that I dont like children, or the very thought of giving birth. I wasnt planning on children anyway, but that really drove the point home.

Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my...

[montecristo.livejournal.com]

OMFG! They've upstaged Bullwinkle! (Maybe she needs another hat!)

Those idiots.

[montecristo.livejournal.com]

Ball-gags do nothing to stop noise at all, by themselves. All they do is stop articulate speech. Fools. Those things will never sell.

Re: Those idiots.

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

What happens when something that's used to prevent articulate speech is put on someone incapable of articulate speech? Do you suppose they cancel one another out and the person becomes a Toastmaster?

Re: Those idiots.

[f00dave.livejournal.com]

No, you go to jail for child abuse, dumbass.

;-)

Re: Aquinian

[shanmonster.livejournal.com]

Yes, I saw that. It's rather odd that there isn't more, though. snowy_kathryn and I were interviewed extensively, and many photos were taken. I wonder what happened to the feature article that was supposed to be printed....