Can't Say That Hurt My Feelings, Lady.

[shanmonster]

Every now and then, someone tries to insult me by referencing my size.

Usually, they roll their eyes and tell me to eat a sandwich. This does bother me a bit. For several years, I was underweight. It took me years to build up muscle so that I was no longer a rack of bones. I think it's just as offensive to tell a thin person to "eat a sammich" as it is to tell a fat one to "lay off the bonbons". It's one thing if you ask someone if they think you're too thin/fat. But it's entirely a different thing when it comes unasked, and I find it particularly rude when it comes from a stranger.

Last night was different. It wasn't just my size that disgruntled this woman: it was my level of fitness, as well. I was getting a t-shirt, and the woman behind the counter asked me what size. I told her a small, and she rolled her eyes. Then she said, in a tone one might use if you saw someone peeing on the floor, "And I see you biked here, so you can take your sized small shirt and bike home again," and she laughed in a way to her co-worker that I think was equivalent to her eye rolling.

I guess I chalk it up to jealousy. The only thing stopping her from getting in shape is her own bad attitude.

I can't say I'm the slightest bit ashamed of being someone who bikes everywhere. And neither am I ashamed of wearing small clothes. I have large t-shirts, too. Can't say I'm ashamed of those, either.

I am, however, ashamed of that woman's bad manners.

Comments

[mysteryelfx.livejournal.com]

So, how to refer to larger women without offending them? I would never say "fat chicks".

[valkryor.livejournal.com]

Ask what they want to be called. I tend to not get offended if someone calls me fat (I am), even if they're trying to be insulting.

[zydee.livejournal.com]

I say "big girl" when referring to myself, but if I refer to others, I'll say "large lady" or something as neutral as possible. I usually don't refer to people's size at all, though, unless directly asked. "Goddess-sized" is a horrible term in every direction, but the one that really pisses me off is "curvey". I rationalized that one for myself too, but now that I look back on what I really looked like, the "curves" in question were sausage-shaped, not hourglass!

That clerk was absolutely horrible, though. I'm shocked Shan took that shit from her.

[silverfae.livejournal.com]

By name? *g*

[mysteryelfx.livejournal.com]

Roya, that's not really what I meant. But I understand what you are saying. I'm speaking in generalities, rather than specifically.

I make clothes, so sometimes referring to larger sized people more generally is necessary. I always find it slightly awkward when I have to talk about 2X and 3X sizes. I dont want to offend anyone.

[silverfae.livejournal.com]

I know, I was being a smartyass. I'll smack my own wrist now.

I use "big" or "large" if I really have to be size-specific for a general description.
Although it's rather amazing that this b*tch Shan is talking about managed to make "small" into an insulting term. I suppose ti's all tone and context.