Taking a Dump

Bah. My cold is leaving my head and descending into my lungs. Asthma-filled coughing wonderland, I bid you welcome! And before I go to work, I'm clearing out my browser tabs.

Outrage over 'choke the chicken' toy: Teach your children that torturing animals is fun!

Professor of Death: "'Daddy, I want to be a martyr. Can you get me an explosive belt?' When Abu Qaqa al-Tamimi's 9-year-old son asked for his help in becoming a suicide bomber, he was, to say the least, taken aback."

Senators: Bloggers may not be true journalists: So I guess this means Weekly World News writers can get immunity that news bloggers cannot. Interesting.

Snake hiding in sewers is caught: Like an urban legend, only true!

Man Guilty of Child Porn Cartoons: Possessing compromising pictures of Astro Boy can get you registered as a sex offender. That's fucked up.

Rat Monster: Too silly to be believed.

Lil Markie: Christianity meets creepy. I'm scared.

Helena: NSFW. Meet Helena, a multiple amputee Real Doll.

Drunk of the Week Extra: Oktoberfest: Probably NSFW. Read about an interesting new beer.

I Squash Men For a Living: Possibly NSFW, although she claims it's not sexual.

And now for your special bonus Wiccan section: What Causes a WICCAN? and Wicca: Intoxicated By Christian Blood!

And in other news, I'd get a kick out of wearing this outfit. I especially like the gloves.

Oi

Customers are frustrating me today. They're oddly uncommunicative. Here's an example:

Me: Thank you for calling *** Hotels. How may I help you?
Silly Customer (SC): ....
Me: Hello?
SC: Yeah. I'd like a room.
Me: Sure! At which hotel?
SC: (in a you-must-be-stupid voice). Your hotel, of course.
Me: In which city?
SC: Oh. Uh, Alberta, Canada.
Me: And which city?
SC: ...
Me: Alberta is a province with several cities.
SC: Oh. Uh, Edmonton.
Me: And which nights are you looking for?
SC: Oh, any.
Me: Rates will vary depending on the time of week or year. Can you give me a date to start with?
SC: ...
Me: Hello?
SC: Uh, yeah?
Me: Which days are you looking for?
SC: ... Maybe something next week.
Me: And how many days?
SC: About three.
Me: Would you like me to check next Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, then?
SC: ...
Me: Hello?

....

And it goes on and on like this. Gah.

I'm glad I have the weekend off. Maybe they'll get smarter in my absence.

Getting Better?

I started using my poi on my breaks again today. I already got a new trick down: over-the-head weaves. I'm also much more competent with my kick directional changes, both with and without my eyes open. All of my tricks work with my eyes open or closed. Vision really has nothing to do with poi, I find, unlike staff work, where you need to be able to see to catch high tosses.

I'm also further on my way to figuring out the elusive one-handed butterfly, thanks to a well-timed tip by f00dave.

Because of the call centre plague, I haven't been to the gym in a week. I hope I'm feeling better by Monday. I'd hate to lose my enormous she-hulk muscles. Ha!